Mark was once regarded as the hottest male stripper the Midwest had ever seen. But time and neglect has taken its toll. Mark now hires himself out to the local nursing homes and work has been slow. Apparently, his youthful good looks have abandoned him. Out of pity, Sandy brought him into the band. He is on double secret probation and his next screw-up will place him on the next bus out of Branford. He is not worried. His mantra “It’s 873 miles to Chicago, we have a full tank of gas, half a packet of cigarettes, it’s dark and we’re wearing sunglasses… HIT IT!”
He recently played Vegas and has sung back-up for John Bon-Jovi, Chicago, ZZ-Top, and Survivor. He is undefeated in competition as a Scottish Drummer. When asked if he “Wanted a medal or a chest pin it on”? He took the medals. He said he was happy with his wife’s chest.
Mark is very fond of his Scottish heritage. His wife encouraged him to find another loud instrument to play so he took up the Bagpipes. If you listen closely to his pipe playing, you can vaguely make out Scotland the Brave and Amazing Grace. Recently, Scotland decided against Independence because they feared Mark might move there and try to become King.
As a drummer, he is known to drop a beat and then blame it on the Bass Player. He will try to make up for it by playing too many beats a measure or two later. He says its a new form of music. Please do not clap when this happens, this will only encourage him to do it again. Believe me, he will do it again, and again, and again.